It's really weird writing this thing when it's not anonymous. I find myself really censoring myself..as if what I put out there somehow defines me...It's just weird. I'm not sure I like it. I like it when I have something "important" to say..but when it's just me? It's weird. I want to figure out a way to write a blog but not make it about me. But everything I have learned or am going through is because I am me, living through this body, feeling through this soul. I wish I had a *niche* or a specialty. I try to think of what I am good at, what I naturally find myself doing. And in the online world it's more responding to others, connecting with others, asking for help or helping those who are asking. So what the hell do you do with a blog? Because I feel like that's my thing: being alive. people. souls. feeling. There are plenty of psychology blogs out there, and I'm just a girl learning how to understand all my parts and love them. and love others'. So what, do I post my journal-girl-swingset poetry shit? Do I talk about my journey with anxiety (it's been done before), or what I'd have in my dream kitchen?
I know I want to be here. I've wanted a blog for a long time. I just don't know what to *do* with it, how to help people with it. How to make something better somewhere. It's kinda hard to write about things without automatically putting yourself in a superior position (because you are the one writing, the one talking) and I hate that. I don't ever ever ever want anyone to think I'm acting like I have my shit together and let me smear my golden, sugary lifestyle all over your screens...No way.
For now I'm trying to figure out what people need that I can give. (doesn't that sound so ick, so self righteous??) but that's not what I mean. I guess I need to think, what am I good at that others are interested in? Hm. Still thinking.....hmmmmm. I'm kind of just me and I like to take care of things. So?
I guess it's just Saturday for now.
hmmm... I think blogger just ate my comment. I'll rewrite a shorter version of it: this is your space, write what you want. It doesn't matter if it "has been done before" it will be different because you are adding your voice to it. I think if you are writing honestly, and not over thinking it too much, you will write what someone needs. You won't appeal to everyone, but no one ever will.
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